May 10, 2016

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10 Steps To Being A #GirlBoss

Image via mylola.com

 

 

Okay so a couple of months ago a wonderful friend of mine lent me a book that is pretty much the paperback version of a kick up the butt and in the world of a self-confessed procrastinator, this book was a game changer!

 

The book is called #GirlBoss and is the rags to riches success story of Sophia Amoruso the CEO of Nasty Gal, and if you haven't read it yet do yourself the favour and get onto that stat, because it's phenomenal.

 

Don't get me wrong you do not have to own your own business nor even be a leader of any sort to be inspired by her unrelenting work ethic and humble approach to business and lifestyle. As a wellness coach I took her head on approach to business as a model in which to approach life and an attitude to adopt in order to achieve all my self-aspiring goals, as a new member of the #GirlBoss movement! 

 

So ladies, here it is, my short list of things you can do today to ramp up your confidence, give you a sense of purpose and essentially give you the motivation to take life by the balls and bring your "game" to the next level.

That's right, no more excuses, no more procrastination, we're doing it together and we're doing it today! 

 

 

1. Stop caring what people think of you.

“No matter where you are in life, you'll save a lot of time by not worrying too much about what other people think about you. The earlier in your life that you can learn that, the easier the rest of it will be.”

Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

God I wish I understood this in high school the way I do now. Do you have any idea how much negative thoughts, stress and worry rob you of your time and energy? Time and energy that could be channelled towards positive changes, increased happiness and success in your life!? The truth is it doesn't matter who you are, how you look or what you do for living,  there is nothing more attractive than a woman who is confident and knows her worth!

Confidence does not mean being the loudest person in the room, confidence is the ability to be so comfortable in your own skin that the opinions of others remain just that, their opinion, and don't become your identity. 

Always remember that whatever someone thinks about you is always a reflection of their own reality and inner conflicts, not of your own, however the second you buy into their thoughts and opinions you make it your own reality and thus make it your problem. 

So stop it! I mean it! You know better, and you deserve better. However it is you want to be, tell yourself you are that already and you will be. 

 

 

2. Stop comparing yourself to others.

“The energy you’ll expend focusing on someone else’s life is better spent working on your own. Just be your own idol.”

- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

Enough of this "oh em gee, I want to be her", "I want her body", "I want her life". No! No you don't, because you'll never be her, you'll never have her body and you'll never have her life. 

But with commitment and self-belief you can have the best version of you, your best and healthiest body, you can have your dream life, you just need to stop spending so much time worshipping and spend more time working. Working on yourself, working on your dreams, working on being unbelievably f-ing happy! 

You already possess everything you need to have everything you want, you just need to get out of your own way and go get it.

 

 

3. Ditch the bad, take action and have fun.

“Abandon anything about your life and habits that might be holding you back. Learn to create your own opportunities. Know that there is no finish line; fortune favours action. Race balls-out toward the extraordinary life that you’ve always dreamed of, or still haven’t had time to dream up. And prepare to have a hell of a lot of fun along the way.” 

- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

A lot of people hold onto negative influences in their lives because it's comfortable, it's what they know and staying there means not being pushed and therefore are not required to take action and make too many positive changes in their lives.

Change is hard, I get it, it's uncomfortable, but it's supposed to be. Through the discomfort we grow, and as we grow we understand ourselves better, and with this understanding comes a confidence and self-assurance we never would have found by staying in our comfort zone.

Change may be hard but not as hard as looking back on your life and achieving none of things you wanted to because you were too afraid to try, or worse too afraid to fail. 
 

Which brings me to my next point....

 

 

4. Adopt the attitude - there is no such thing as failure, only lessons to be learnt.

"There are secret opportunities hidden inside every failure." 

- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

There are going to be times when you are tired, fed up, when you're challenged, tested, when it hurts and you just want it to stop. But the thing is, failure only exists if you give up, if you stop trying. Failure only exists the moment you stop moving forward. Failure only exists if you stop doing the best you can in any given moment even if that's not much, it's something.

Every time you slip up, every time you fall off track, every time something doesn't go as well as you planned it is an opportunity to learn more about yourself or your business. Whatever the situation is, it is the universe giving you an opportunity to learn!

So no matter what life throws your way, know what you want, work your ass off 'til you get it and have fun along the way! 

After all this is your life we are talking about! It's meant to be an adventure.

 

 

5. Reap what you sow.

“Each time you make a good decision or do something nice or take care of yourself; each time you show up to work and work hard and do your best at everything you can do, you’re planting seeds for a life that you can only hope will grow beyond your wildest dreams. Take care of the little things—even the little things that you hate—and treat them as promises to your own future. Soon you’ll see that fortune favours the bold who get shit done.”

- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

Biggest lesson to be learnt of all and one of the main points I took from this book - Show up, don't be lazy and give your absolute best to EVERYTHING you touch! 

Whether it's your work or your house chores, always give 100% of your effort and you'll begin to see big changes in your life.

 

"What about your second biggest lesson Sam?" Well i'm glad you asked... 

 

 

6. Do it for yourself, nobody else.

“Even with no manager watching to give me a gold star, it was important to do my best. Who cares if a tree falls in a forest and no one hears it? The tree still falls. If you believe that what you’re doing will have positive results, it will—even if it’s not immediately obvious. When you hold yourself to the same standard in your work that you do as a friend, girlfriend, student, or otherwise, it pays off.”

- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

Do it for you, because you want a successful and fulfilling life, not because someone else wants you to, or told you to. Do it because YOU have standards, because YOU don't want let YOU down, that is when you'll get results, that is when you'll feel like a #GirlBoss.. when you've given your absolute best and don't need a pat on the back from anyone else but yourself. 

 

 

7. Be committed.

“Make a schedule for yourself that incorporates time for phone calls to catch up with your annoying family and friends, sex with your boyfriend, exercise, dinners, therapy, parties, texting, social networking, mani-pedis, shopping, and the work that’s gonna get you paid to maintain the lifestyle you so desire! Create boundaries and structure! You have to be your own parent!” 
- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

Being a #GirlBoss doesn't mean it's all work and no play. A happy life is a balanced life and in order to maintain that takes organisation, effort and commitment. 

Get yourself a scheduling system whether that's a hand written diary, your phone calender or a superhuman memory that remembers everything  (not recommended), get something that works for you and stick to it.

For life to be balanced you need to feel your getting enough of everything, but keep in mind that doesn't look the same for everyone. Figure out your priorities and where you like to spend most your time and schedule it accordingly. Some of these could include: health and fitness, me-time, hobbies, relationships, social-life and career.

 

 

8. Be humble, be honest but above all be yourself.

“It’s cool to be kind. It’s cool to be weird. It’s cool to be honest and to be secure with yourself.” 
- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

This article is not about changing who you are to become a #GirlBoss, it's about embracing who you are to the absolute fullest in order to make your mark on the world, because the reality is you are the only you on this planet, so you need to make it count.

However what's also important in your climb to success, is to make sure you're not walking over other people to get there. Integrity, honesty and humility are qualities you cannot fake in life, and if you try the true agenda behind your actions will always become apparent eventually.

 

So make the words you speak and the actions you make, honourable and admirable to the people around you. Know your values and speak your truth and live strongly by your moral code so you will have the strength and dignity to walk away from anything that does not serve your true and honest purpose. 

 

 

9. Be positive.

“It’s the age-old concept of like attracts like, or the law of attraction. You get back what you put out, so you might as well think positively, focus on visualizing what you want instead of getting distracted by what you don’t want, and send the universe your good intentions so that it can send them right back.” 
- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

Besides the fact that nobody enjoys the company of someone who mopes around feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, negative attitudes and belief can seriously hold you back from achieving what you want. 

Your subconscious works in amazing but not always helpful ways. If you are a negative person or hold deep seeded negative beliefs, for example "I do not deserve love" then you will go through life sabotaging your relationships, your self-esteem and any activity that could prove that belief to be untrue.

Your subconscious may only be trying to protect you, but it's essentially protecting you from a threat that was never there. It is extremely important to counteract all your negative beliefs and thoughts with positive and reassuring ones. Your subconscious hears and believes what you tell it, so the more you feed it with uplifting and positive affirmations about yourself, your job, your partner, your friends and anything else you can think of, the more this becomes the reality in which you live in. 

 

 

10. Create your dream life. Live your dream life.

“You create the world, blink by blink. It is entirely yours to discover and yours to create.”

- Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS

 

As much as some people like to believe life just happens to them and they have no control over it, those people could not be further from the truth!

Sure, it's true, life happens and a lot of things that get thrown our way we can't see them coming let alone stop them from happening. But it's not all doom and gloom because fortunately there are things in life we can control and that is what we think about what happens to us, how we react to what happens to us and what we learn from what happens to us. And those my dear, will be the things that steer you on your path through life - your actions, your thoughts and your awareness. Get control over those and you become the master of your universe, the creator of your destiny and the dancer of your dance.

 

 

So ladies, what do we think? Are you ready take back control over your life and be unstoppable in your pursuit of your dream life!? Believe in yourself, trust yourself and show the world you can be the ultimate #GirlBoss.

You got this! 

 

- Sam Jenkins xx

 

PS. Any ladies reading this who would like a little extra help in their pursuit for #GirlBoss status, I offer international online life coaching and online personal training to anyone interested in designing and living out their dream life and transforming themselves from the inside out! 

Just click here to be directed to my home page where you can see my range of services and follow the prompts to arrange a free Skype consultation. 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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© 2019 by Samantha Jenkins